I had a choice

Once again sometimes my own blogs continue to speak to right where I’m at in the moment. In my last blog I wrote on expectation versus reality. Over the last few weeks, especially the week of Thanksgiving I have lived that out.

It’s 545am on Thanksgiving morning and I’m sitting here in L’s nursery rocking him. To be honest this has been a tough week for us. I don’t say this for sympathy, but to be vulnerable with you. Our little guy has been sick on and off for the past 2 weeks. He has been in and out of the doctor numerous times. We thought he was improving so we decided to move forward with our plans to see my family for Thanksgiving. Our flight was Sunday morning, and instead of driving to the airport that morning we drove to the urgent care doctor.

In my mind, I hoped that we would be told he was still ok to fly, but in my Mama gut, I knew that wasn’t going to happen. We knew he had croup, but it had gotten worse. To add to it he now had a virus that mimicked the flu called parainfluenza. Poor thing! They advised us that he shouldn’t fly. We thought about just putting off the trip for a few days, but knew recovery time could take a while. We would also be visiting family with small babies, and I wouldn’t want to be the one to spread any germs to those sweet little babes. We called my family and let them know we weren’t going to be able to come and of course they were very loving and encouraging about it. I knew with his immune system down and him needing time to recover that flying wouldn’t be a smart option for us. All I wanted was for my baby to feel better!

Was it disappointing? Absolutely! I knew I could be negative by throwing myself a pity party for the next week while I was supposed to be with my family, and soaking up time with my friends or I could choose to find the positive in things. Some of the days it was hard to do that, but I kept trying even with the littlest things! I was running on extremely small amounts of sleep so I had to continually keep my emotions in check. Did I mess up some? Yes, I did, but I could always keep trying again.

One of the things I’m truly blessed with is a a wonderful family here in South Carolina. They love us hard, and always make sure we are taken care of. We went to my in-laws on Thanksgiving Day and ended up having such a great time. That was Lincoln’s first day out of the house and the first day I was seeing that full of energy and ornery little boy come out again. He played hard with his cousins and loved sitting on his Papa’s John Deere mower which he thinks is a tractor. He is obsessed with that kind of stuff right now!

You are probably wondering by now why in the world is she telling us all of this?! I’m telling you all of this because I had a choice. I had a choice to let my holiday or week be ruined. I had a choice to be negative or positive. If I had chosen negativity I would have missed out on so many special moments that brought a smile to my face. I would have missed out on seeing how special my in-laws are for always making us feel loved and included. I would have missed out on my fun little Black Friday adventure with just me and my hubs laughing and drinking Starbucks caramel apple spice while Christmas shopping.

Sometimes things in life don’t go the way we hoped or planned. It may be a missed trip home, timing of something you are waiting for, or even an expectation you have set. Let’s try and find something positive in each day. Even if it’s a hard one, I ask myself what’s something good about today? Even if a lot of negative things are going on around you ask yourself what’s something positive I have going on in my life? If you are having trouble answering that then reach out to someone. It could be a loved one or a friend and simply say I’m needing some encouragement right now- what is something positive you see in me? Or is there something you feel lead to share with me? I have two friends in my life who we share and encourage each other regularly. It is many times random, but sometimes we ask for each other’s help on the days we need it. Those words, encouragement, worship songs they send, or bible verses are often times exactly the things I need in those very moments. Find those people and let them encourage you!

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